Tag Archives: Kuenta kòrtiku

Muhénan mièrdè asin’aki no meresé di haña un bon hòmber!

Reading Time: 5 minutes

Poko dianan ei mi tabata atendé ku algun kos den mi kamber, i mi tabata tende gritunan masha spantoso. Mi a tende un hòmber grita, zundra, i tambe mi tabata tende zonido di kosnan ku tabata dal kibra.

Mi a sali pafó i ripara ku ta mi bisiñanan tabata pleita asina. Mi a tende e hòmber zundra e muhé bis’é:

“Kon bo por hasi mi algu asin’aki? Tur kos mi a hasi pa bo. Tur kos mi a duna bo. Anto asina aki bo ta paga mi? (Tangalan…..kos ta kai kibra.) Kon bo por ta kapas ha? Anto den mi mesun kas? Bo ta un yu di puta bo sa.”

Anto e muhé tabata kontesta:

“Si, pasó nunka bo no tei. Fo’i mainta 7or bo ta sali bai trabou, bo ta bin kas mèrdia bin yena bo stoma i despues bolbe sali bèk. Te anochi 9or mi ta bolbe mira bo atrobe. Bo ta yega, kome, baña, subi kama drumi. Bo no ta atendé mi. Bo no ta duna mi atenshon, ni kariño ni amor. Kiko bo a kere? Ku mi no sa haña speshi? Ta hende mi yama Arturo. Ta hende mi yama. Mi tin sanger ta kore den mi kurpa.”

“Tangalanan pin pan”(Kos a kai kibra atrobe.)

“Sera bo smul. Ta pa abo haña ko’i kome mi tabata traha duru asina. Ta pa abo haña moda di bisti tur bo pañanan karu mi tabata traha duru asina. Ta pa bo haña moda di hasi bo uña, kabei i bo ‘lashes’ mi tabata traha duru asina. Anto asina bo ta paga mi? Bo ta hopi malagradesí bo sa.”

“Badam boem bam”

Un kos masha duru mes a zona, i mi a sali bai wak mesora ta kiko. Mi a drenta nan kas i puntra, “Hepa, kiko ta pasando?” Dikon boso ta zundra asina?”

Arturo hopi emoshoná a kuminsá splika mi ku el a topa un kondon bou di e laken riba nan kama i asina el a haña sa ku e muhé ta kòrta su orea.

Mi a bira wak e muhé i bis’é, “Maryyyy, ta ki esei? Kon bo por tabata kapas di hasi algu asina? Kasi sigur ta e hòmber den pikòp ku sa bin trese mango pa bo. Ta kuné bo ta kòrta orea di Arturo mi bisiña?”

Arturo ta bira puntra, “Kua hòmber esei? Ken koño esei ta?”

Mary rabiá a kontesta mi, “Abo tene bo sanka afó. Bo no tin nada di bisa.”

Arturo rabiá a bira zuai Mary ku un pal’i basora. Mi a tene i bis’é, “No Arturo. Esei si no. Mi por komprondé ku e muhé a faya ku bo i a lástima bo sintimentunan. Pero bo no tin ku baha na su nivel. Loke bo tin ku hasi ta respetá bo mes i bai lag’é. Pasó mi ta sigur ku eifó tin yen muhé ku si lo sa di apresiá un hòmber trahadó manera bo.”

Arturo di, “Si bo sa. Mihó mi bai laga e kaka di muhé aki. Pero un kos mi ta bisa bo Mary. Mi ta manda mi abogado pa bo. Pasó e kos aki si mi no ta tuma. Mi ta bai kita kas, outo ku tur kos fo’i bo. Sanka na man lo bo keda.”

Akinan Mary a kai den otro i a kuminsá yora, “No Arturo, no bai laga mi. Mi no por sin bo. Mi mester di bo dushi. Pordoná mi. Lo mi no hasié mas. Pordoná mi Arturo, no bai laga mi.”

Mary a purba ranka Arturo na su paña, miéntras Arturo tabata purba sali pafó p’e bai for di kas. Arturo a bira kita Mary su man i bis’é “No mishi ku mi ku bo man sushi. Man ku bo tabata mishi ku patin di bo hòmber. No mishi ku mi muhé. Laga mi bai.”

Arturo rabiá a drenta su outo i bai.

Mary a keda den kas bentá abou ta yora. Mi a kana bai serka dje i bis’é, “Bo tin kurashi di yora bo sa. Hopi mièrdè bo ta. Bo a faya ku e hòmber—un bon hòmber—anto awó ku el a bai, bo ke yora tambe? Dikon hende muhe ta asina? Boso kara no tin wesu?”

Mira aki, Mary a lanta fo’i suela bira harta mi ku sla  i keda grita, “M’a bisa bo, mi a bisa bo pa wak pa bo no laga e kondon riba mi kama. Bo a bai lag’é riba kama tòg. Koño, bo no ta tende? Ta bo falta.”

Hopi mièrdè e muhé ei ta sua. Awó e ta kulpa ami ku su relashon a kibra.

Pero serio serio, mi a lubida di tira e kondon afó. Ora mi kaba di hunga, ta kome mi ke kome mesora. Mi ta lubida riba tur sobrá kos.

Den mi bukinan “Awa, Habon ku Past’i Djente’ i ‘ Hink’é aden’ tin hopi historia mas, hopi mas interesante i pikante. Hòmbu, si mi konta bo kosnan ku mi a pasa aden, lo bo no kere. Chèk e bukinan ei i komprobá pa bo mes. Por sierto, keda pendiente pa e “September Special!”

 

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Pa bisa bo frankamente, yu’i Kòrsou ta yu’i p*ta!

Reading Time: 8 minutes

Pa di promé, e nòmber di e artikulo aki di ningun forma ta representá e bèrdat ni mi opinion riba e pueblo yu’i Kòrsou. Di ningun forma mi ke insinuá ku niun hende ku ta yu’i Kòrsou, ta yu di p*ta. Apsolutamente ku nò. Nan ta pió ku esei. Nan ta mama di tur p*ta. Un yu di un p*ta ta un hende inosente. E no por yuda ku su mama tabata p*ta. Yunan di Kòrsou si no. Nan ta hendenan egoista ku ta solamente wak pa nan mes.

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Asin’aki muhénan venezolano ta logra tuma hòmber hasi!

Reading Time: 3 minutes

 Nan ta bisa ku debí na e situashon prekario na nan pais, nos mester trata e venezolanonan bon. Ami a bai purba hasi bon ku nan, pero mira loke a pasa mi.

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Loke a pasa mi ‘atrobe’ na Veeris Resort (Chino)!

Reading Time: 6 minutes

Tabata un momentu hopi tristu pa hinter Kòrsou na momentu ku MEO i BAB a sera Veeris Resort. Manera bosnan sa kaba, na momentunan ei, ami tabata den Veeris Resort, i nan a saka mi pafó ku kondon bisti, ku mi pañanan den mi man, sin ku mi por a logra dòp e kos aden.

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Bien bèrdè Kòrsou no ta bai dilanti…..hopi rabiá mi ta!

Reading Time: 5 minutes

Ayera, riba un djabièrnè fin di luna, koriendo den tráfiko di Kòrsou mi a topa mi ku kòntròl di polis. Mi no ke niun hende komprondé mi malu; ami mas ku tur hende ta sostené tur ehersisio ku kuerpo polisial hasi pa yuda hasi nos pais mas sigur pa nos tur biba ariba. Pero mi ke men, tin kos ku simplemente no por.

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Awor si mi ta kla ku muhénan ku kos falsu na nan kurpa.

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Un muhé ku yen kos falsu na su kurpa a her’i kibra mi bida i te asta mata mi. Bo ke sa kiko a pasa? Laga mi konta bo!

Komo un hende hòmber komun i koriente mi a bai sali ku un yùfrou ku segun ami tabata ‘all natural’. Loga e no tabata tin nada ‘natural’ riba su kurpa. Pa di promé, e tabata tin un peluka straño bistí. E kos a keda manera tènt Wigwam riba su kabes. Masha fastioso.

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Mi promé eksperensha den un misa!

Reading Time: 7 minutes

(Atvertensha: si bo ta religiosamente sensibel, por fabor no lesa e historia aki. Kòrda mi a atvertí! No lesa kaba bin reklamá!)

Esnan ku ta sigui CuckooPress regularmente por a nota un par’i dia ku mi tabata ousente. Esei tabata debí na algun problemanan personal, emoshonal, sosial, finansiero, familiar i sikológiko ku mi tabata konfrontando.

Esei a pone ku mi a papia ku algun hende ku a konsehá mi bai misa djadumingu i pidi pa iluminashon djariba. Pues esei mi a hasi. Mi mester bisa si ku nunka mi no a yeg’i bai misa, pues e eksperensha di ayera tabata kompletamente nobo p’ami.

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

‘I don’t need sex. Aqualectra F*CKS me every day!’

Reading Time: 5 minutes

Ora mi ta skibi sierto kosnan riba Internèt, mi ta hasié ku masha koutela pa mi no haña mi ku kaso den korte pa manchamentu di nòmber di hende òf kompania. Pero ku loke mi ta bai publiká aki si ta nèt un kaso den korte mi ke.

Mi a kaba di skibi riba mi muraya di Facebook: “I don’t need sex. Aqualectra F*CKS me every day!”

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Di e forma aki mi a pèrdè mi último trabou!

Reading Time: 3 minutes

E hendenan ku konosé mi sa ku mi ta un èks-polis ku tabata traha mi trabou serio i trata tur hende ku rèspèt. Mi a traha sinku aña komo polis promé ku mi a pèrdè mi trabou pa un simpel ko’i kèns!

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Telefon Mar*ku ‘for sale’…..preis di ganga!

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Mi ta bende mi Nokia E7, pa motibu ku e telefon aki ta masha mar*ku!

E telefon su bateria a baha i mi a pone karga. Na momentu ku mi a hinka e kargadó aden, e lus ku normalmente tin ku sende pa indiká ku e ta kargando tabata keda ‘flash’. Mi a lag’é un ratu aden pa wak si e ta stòp di ‘flash’, pero despues di un ratu e ta paga, i e telefon no ta karga.

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Kon pa responsabilisá gastunan di un investigadó privá?

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Mi ta un hòmber ku ta atmití ku mi no ta perfekto. Mi tin mi inseguridatnan. Un bia un èks frei di mi a kòrta mi orea ku mi mió amigu, i awor mi tin miedu ku tur muhé lo kòrta mi orea.

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Si bo no por ku bientu no subi riba motosaikel!

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Ta konosí ku korementu riba motosaikel ta algu masha eksitante i plasentero. Hopi hende muhé gusta hòmber ku ta kore motosaikel. Pa nan, un hòmber riba motosaikel ta un hòmber tòf ku no tin miedu di nada i mas ku klaro komo koredó di motosaikel, bo ta probecha!

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Problema ku muhé paranoya ku bon tete.

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Masha dia mi tin un muhé riba mi ta keda insistí pa mi drenta relashon kuné. Dor ku e muhé aki ta masha paranoya mes, mané hende ku falta di atenshon, mi a bis’é bon kla ku ami no tin tempu ni kabes pa muhé aworakí.

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Nan kier a ‘gangbang’ mi!

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Normalmente mi sa konta historianan fiktisio, pero esaki si ta “true story”.

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

Ántes i awor…..krónika di un hòmber imperfekto!

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Eksperensha di bida t’e úniko kos ku por kambia un hòmber. Un hòmber tin ku kometé fayonan den su bida pa asina e madurá i bira un hòmber imperfekto pero hopi mas responsabel. Ami a kambia hopi, ántes mi no tabata e persona ku mi ta awe:

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

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