Four reasons why you were hating on singer Gale Harry!

Reading Time: 6 minutes

 There is a video going around Facebook of a lady singer named Gale Harry that caught quite a few steamed reactions. She’s apparently a country singer from Curaçao and one of her videos, which was uploaded about a year ago, got more than 20K views. Here’s a clip of one of her songs:

She’s nice and looks very friendly but most people have been questioning her singing abilities. She can sing—we all can—but some of us should only sing within the four walls of our bathroom, and so should she. When I saw her videos, I wasn’t impressed at all, so I closed it down and continued with my life. However other people decided that they want to share the video in attempt to either mock, belittle or make fun of her or somehow share emotions of contempt towards her with friends. Most people say that she shouldn’t be singing at all, that she’s a disgrace to Curaçao, that she should be ashamed of herself for doing the video, bla bla bla!

I somewhat agree, but……

There is one thing I’ve learned in life: most people are afraid to follow their dreams, others are not. It is those who have the courage to put themselves to shame in order to achieve something, reaches their goals, whatever their goals might be. They may even achieve things that were not even part of their goals, but they shot for the moon and landed on a star.

I’m sure you have some goals hidden inside of you that you are too afraid to follow. It might be due to fear of failure or fear of judgment. Gale Harry clearly has no fear (and apparently no shame either). Is that a bad thing? Actually is not, and I’ll tell you why.

While fear of failure may come genuinely out of a fear to realize that you cannot do something that is important for you to be able to do, most times it stems out of fear of judgment. That’s the fear we all have of being judged by others. We have this fear because as part of a society, we don’t want to appear as weak or perceived negatively in the eyes of others. This is the reason we don’t want people to think that we are fearful, anxious, coward, desperate, stingy, mentally ill, lacking confidence, lacking motivation, unethical, mean, poor etc. This is a fear that most times is beneath or on top of other fears we have and it usually triggers other behaviors we display like for example envy, jealousy and even the need to judge others.

As funny as it may sound, those who fear being judged—and let that fear hold them back— are usually the ones who are quick to judge others. This is nothing but a defense mechanism we have as a response of our own fears. Now, I don’t want to get all Dr.Phil on you here, but you need to know this so I can continue blabbing about what I was blabbing about. Get it?

Now, what confused me about people was the way they were sharing the video, while clearly judging the girl for the courage she took to create and publish those videos. While I was observing that, I was asking myself “If you don’t like it, why do you even share it?” Actually the only thing they did was giving her the attention she was probably looking for. But of course, you want others to see what you saw and that you thought it was what? Ridiculous?

Now, she might not make it as a country singer (I hope not), but who knows. Perhaps soon you will see her working as a news anchor on a local TV station. Because while you were laughing at her, all you did was promoting her. And she does have nice boobs!

Here’s the thing…
We all have things we would want to do, but that we let fear of judgment hold us back. That includes me. I wish I could be a stripper and a gigolo—like I mentioned plenty times—but I fear being sexually molested and lusted by horny women who would throw their money at me, intimidating me with their dire need for pleasure and forcing me to have wild meaningless coitus with them. (Serious face)

Oke, that’s a whole lot of crap. I just can’t dance, and I fear getting ugly boring clients with STD’s. But for real, I wish I could go to a bar, and pickup a one night stand, but I fear being judged by women for being desperate for sex.  Oke, that’s also not true, I don’t do it because I suck at small-talk. I am always desperate for sex. I’m so desperate that I even wrote a book about crazy things I did in my life in order to get sex. It’s called “Hink’é aden”, which means “Put it in”.

Hink’é aden!

The book will soon be available for you to buy! (When I say soon, I mean whenever I’m ready to publish it. Don’t be asking me when it will be out. STOP PRESSURING ME!)

But seriously, my point is we all have things we want to do—dreams we want to achieve—but we fear taking the leap of faith that would make our dreams come true. This causes us to judge others and these are the four reasons why:

1. We are insecure
Human beings have a nasty habit to put others down when we are insecure about who and what we are. It doesn’t help us with anything when we put others down, it just lessens that crappy feeling we have about ourselves. It’s kind of like a schadenfreude-ish feeling.

2. We are scared
This is a primitive reason why we judge. When we see someone as a threat we may judge them in order to put them down, so we can feel better. We also may fear someone who is different from us and we judge them negatively because they are not like us.

3. We are lonely
Just like people use gossip to bond with others in a social way, same way we use judgment as a bonding tool. When people feel lonely and in need of social interaction, they may turn to the easiest way to bond with someone, which is gossip and judgment. However no real connection can be made based on negativity, so at the end you will remain lonely.

4. We are seeking change in our lives.
We are quick to judge others when we want to see change in our own life. For example, I may want to get married real bad, but I am unable to find a suitable girlfriend. This causes me to judge others who get married short after they get into a relationship. I may even silently wish their marriage to fail. (I only do this when the woman rejects me to take off with another man. I will so wish for their marriage to fail.)

Most people are not even aware when they are being judgmental and why. After all, defense mechanisms are unconscious, self deceptive and contain denial. It really saddens me how we feel the urge to put others down. We know how we struggle ourselves with lack of courage to do things we dream of doing. Why do we have to put others down when they choose to overcome that fear?

But all jokes aside, the girl Gale Harry may not be much of a singer, but I really liked her boobs. If she was a little less skinny and had a little bit more ass, I would be all over her. Since she has no shame, imagine the things we could do together. I just hope she’s a better moaner than a singer!

© Lion Spratt

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