I needed a relationship…..and I got it!

 I needed a partner, I needed a relationship
I needed a soul mate, to give me companionship

I needed a family, so we could live together happily
I needed a reputable job where I could develop rapidly
I needed cars, house, and things that would convey financial stability

I needed for people to see my wonderful life
Showing them how to live like husband and wife
I needed them to see me taking my family to travel
Bragging about the life I live in my fairy castle

I needed a big marriage
To give me memories that would never perish
I needed photographs of the moments
That would attest that my perfect life couldn’t blemish
I needed a big romantic dance at the end that forever I would cherish

I needed to go to an exotic island for my honeymoon
I needed our marriage to be romantically consumed
I needed to hold hands and give kisses in public
And forever feel those butterflies flying around in my stomach.

I needed people to know that I was smart, married and happy
Yes, I needed all that, and I got it!
I got everything, and maybe more than I ever wanted
Everybody knew that I had a wonderful life
Whenever they got in trouble they came to me for advice
I frequently heard comments like “I envy you, I wish I had your life”

But little did they know
Little did they know my life was a living hell
Little did they how much I was so ashamed to tell
Little did they know anything that could even ring a bell

Little did they know how much I regret they day we met
Little did they know how much I came to hate the sunset
Little did they know how I was afraid to sleep next to him
Little did they know how I held myself once the lights start to dim
Little did they know how many times he forced me into sex
Little did they know I had to tolerate his affair with his ex

Little did they know my home was a total wreck
Little did they know I didn’t even had my children’s respect
Little did they know about eldest son alcohol addiction
Little did they know the youngest one is still in prison

Little did they know how hard I tried to dispel the gloom
Little did they know my vacations were all trips to the emergency room
Little did they know how many times I cried myself to sleep
Little did they know how many times I thought if I could ever leave

Little did they know how many times I tried to commit suicide
Little did they know how much it hurts to live a life you try to hide
For so many years I needed so many things for people to see
And they saw everything, except the holocaust tragedy inside of me

If you want an advice now I would gladly give it to you
But unfortunately I have to dispel love story myths that just isn’t true
People create dreams and fantasies they can easily envision
Putting pressure on your life leading you to take erratic decisions
In this life don’t need anything that’s going to make you bleed inside
To create a delusional amorous life for people to certify.
Know yourself, attain knowledge, know what you’re worth
Whatever was meant for you will come, before you leave this earth!

Lionel Spratt

Niun Pataka cover concept


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