What are the benefits of being a gay?

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Sometimes when I’m bored, my mind starts to wander, and I think on lot of things. I don’t mean to disrespect or undervalue any women out there, but this is what I was thinking:

If men and women have been living with feuds for so long, why do they still want to be together?

I can speak for myself, and I confirm that the female body is the most beautiful thing that has ever existed!. Women have undeniably really nice and soft boobs, and an amazingly powerful vagina that can make any man run a marathon barefooted! But the problem is that the female body is being operated by a computer that I believe is infected with several dangerous and malicious Trojans and viruses.

So if men and women have so many problems being in a relationship with each other, how do homosexuals do it? What would be the benefits if I was gay?

Gay couple 11. The first and foremost benefit is “No Venus vs Mars” bullsh*t. We all know and agree that men and women are from different planets. It takes a lot of effort for me to understand women. Even with all the behavioral psychology knowledge that I possess, I still can’t understand them. Hell…..they can’t even understand themselves. I wonder how lesbians deal each other?

gay couple 2 lesbians

2. Even though I’m aware they are fighting for their equal rights on marriage; it is currently a benefit for me. Anyone who wants a relationship with me will just have to accept a living together arrangement. (And even that one is a toughie.)

3. If I were gay, I believe I would be attracted to the masculine type of gays. So I think there will be little trouble when I want to watch a football or baseball game with my ‘boo’, or playing rough outside, without someone yelling “you broke my nail you sun of a b*tch”.

4. No kids. I don’t want to sound mean, but I strongly believe that kids are God’s punishment to adults for having sex. So if I were gay, that would instantly eliminate any kind of “I’m pregnant” surprises.

messy kids

5. Even though women say that guys have excuses too in avoiding sex, I never had any. So I believe if I was in a relationship with another man, I would never hear excuses like “I’m too tired, my head hurts, I am on my period, I have clothes to fold, I just did my nails, I have to clean the house first……I’m not feeling sexy” or any other kind of lame excuses!

6. Never ever have to hear the stupid bullsh*t again of “You only think about sex!” Duhhhh…

Which reminds me:

7. Less talking, more f*cking!

8. No periods. No hormonal changes in their body that makes them unbelievably irrational and talking things that makes completely no sense. YES!

Gay couple 3

(I was kinda aiming for 10 benefits, but I couldn’t find more.)

Now of course, I’m just thinking here. I just wanted to list on the benefits I’m missing on by not being gay. It’s impossible for me to turn gay though. I love the female body way too much. Especially when they fix up their hair really nice,  dress up really sexy, put on a nice cologne, spray some on those nicely round shaped breasts, put on a high heel shoe, and stand tall next to me like the regnant Queen of Sheba! But I do envy all the other gay men out there. They must be really happy with their non-mystified significant other!

I do wonder how they deal with cheating though. Because guys know how hard it is for guys to be faithful. Do they become overly dramatic too when they find out the other partner has been f*cking some other dude?

(Like I always say, don’t take life too seriously. I had fun writing this, I hope you had fun reading it too.)

[Danki pa “like i “share”. Mi ta apresiá mashá. Sinti bo liber pa laga bo komentario atras.]

**Images used in this article is copyrighted by their respective authors. I just happened to google for an image and found what I’ve used, so please don’t sue me, for I have no money to pay you or a lawyer. Plus I fear going to jail.**

[Even though blogging costs a lot of time and money, I don’t feel like charging my blog readers to be able to read my content. I want to keep it free for everyone. However, funds are still needed in order to produce and publish quality content, as well as writing and publishing books. Consider making a one-time donation to Lion Spratt as a way to show your support. Click here to learn how. Thank you in advance for your generosity!]

It's only fair to share...Print this page
Email this to someone
Share on Google+
Tweet about this on Twitter
Share on Facebook

Leave a Reply

Powered by WordPress | Designed by: Image Hosting | Thanks to MegaUpload Search, RapidShare Search and Internet TV

Copy Protected by Chetan's WP-Copyprotect.